Happy Birthday, Husband!

Posted On: 12.16.09

happy bday hub

Dear Husband,

I remember the first time we celebrated your birthday together. We’d just met. There were no presents. It was too early for presents. But there were two of my very favorite things: coffee and conversation. We sat in the big coffee shop. At a small, rickety table. I had a vast mug of coffee in front of me. I’m pretty sure you had a hot chocolate.

And we talked. We couldn’t stop talking. We had so much to say.

I don’t remember everything about that night. I don’t remember the exact words, just that they were boldly and beautifully traded. But I do remember feeling so light, so happy, so alive. I remember thinking about how handsome you are and trying to stifle little girl giggles. I remember marveling at the blue of your eyes and the angle of your jaw. I remember feeling so lucky.

I remember noticing how easy, how effortless, it was to be with you. I remember delighting in the fact that even on a birthday, there was zero pomp and circumstance. That there were no frills. That it was just us.

At our wedding, we danced. We danced a lot. But our first dance is what sticks with me. For all of those lessons, and all that practice, we were absolutely terrible. You stepped on my vast cloud of a dress and I giggled into your arm. There was no grace. But there was so much love. We danced to U2’s “All I Want Is You.” And I remember even in those hazy and happy moments thinking how true the refrain was.

All I Want Is You.

And time has passed because that’s what it does. And now. Things are less simple than they were in that coffee shop on that night. Of course. But things are also leagues more exquisite. Today, just us is a bit different. Today, we have two little girls who are part you and part me. Two little lives to sustain and celebrate. On birthdays. On holidays. On all days.

Today, while you are at work, the girls and I will hold down the fort. We will make cards. We might even attempt a cake. We will wait for you to come home. And when you are home, we will probably do what we do every night. Play a bit. Dance a bit. Laugh a lot. Tonight, like all nights, there will be few frills. Tonight, like all nights, it will be just us. You. Me. Our girls.

But once the girls are asleep, you and I will cuddle on our couch. The old school us. And we will talk. And talk some more. Because years later, we still have so much to say. Much more even. And while you are talking, I will listen, yes, but my mind will be doing its trademark jig – remembering back and bouncing forward – swirling about the profound present moment. A very good moment indeed.

Today you are my birthday boy. And today, like all days, you are also my forever man.

I love you (yes, to tiny pieces),



If you have a moment, feel free to wish my man a very happy birthday!

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50 Comments for: "Happy Birthday, Husband!"
  1. Becca

    What a beautiful tribute to who sounds like a wonderful guy. Happy birthday to him. Enjoy all the moments of this special day!

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      I thought this would be a silly day to respond to comments, but then thought again. Perfect day to practice the skill of thank you. Thanks, Becca! For your warm words. For your new friendship.

  2. Mo

    Awwwwwwww. Coffee and conversation are great. Wine and conversation are also my favourites. Easy and effortless to be with is quite rare, good catch…


    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      Mo – I know you hide behind a thoughtful and meticulous mask, but I think I already have a sense of who you are… A happily married man who is in love with his wife and a certain tiny tot. Am I wrong?

  3. Happy Birthday, Blue-Eyed Charmer! Hope you realize how lucky you are…that wife of yours is something.

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      Thanks, Kitch –

      There are many complicated things in my life, but my love for Husband is pretty simple really. I just love him. To pieces. Boring? Maybe. True? Absolutely.

  4. I love this reflection on the evolving meaning of “just us” – the way in which a two becomes a more-than-two in all the exquisite and complicated ways.

    Happy birthday, Aidan’s Husband. May you both enjoy some “just us” time today.

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      Yes, isn’t it interesting how *just us* evolves? But the evolution is amazing. I would never go back. Ever. The chaos is compelling, our love only deeper. I have a hunch you feel the same way?

  5. OMG – you’re not going to believe this. It’s MY husband’s birthday today, too! Seriously! You and I have WAY too much in common. I sure hope we can get together over the holidays. Oh, and btw, lovely ode to your honey. 😉

  6. I love that you love his lack of frills. I love that you admitted a lack of grace (when dancing). And I’d love to see what your attempted cake looks like. Enjoy the day and all the “presents.”

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      There are certainly frills from time to time. I’m not going to pretend there aren’t. But… the core of our relationship is simple and unvarnished. And I love it that way. Stay tuned for a pic of the cake. It exists! (But is not necessarily pretty. Or nutritious!)

  7. sounds like the perfect celebration!!! wishing you all a terrific night tonight. happy birthday aidan’s husband.

  8. Ahhhh! Happy Birthday to Aidan’s husband!!

  9. Happy, Delightful, Wonderous Birthday!

    Honestly Aidan, I think the no frills birthdays are the most memorable. They stay close to the heart. (Hugs)Indigo

  10. Very sweet…and I LOVE “All I Want is U”…one of the all-time best romantic songs.

  11. Mama

    That was our wedding song as well. Never heard of anyone else who chose it.
    Lovely tribute.

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      Oh my goodness. Same wedding song? That’s fantastic. What an incredible song. What incredible sentiments built into that song. We must chat about this similarity further…

  12. Please send along my birthday wishes to your “forever man.” What a beautiful tribute. Absolutely touching.

    • Aidan Donnelley Rowley

      I will absolutely send along your wishes, Jane. he is my forever man. Part of me thinks that label is a tad cheesy, but another part, the bigger part, thinks it is absolutely right on.

  13. Lovely. And a big happy birthday to add to the pile! Enjoy every minute.

  14. Kat

    As long as you don’t forget this birthday, I think you’re doing ok 🙂

  15. Gale

    I agree the quiet birthdays can be the nicest and most meaningful. I hope your evening of cuddles and conversation on the couch takes you all the way back to that first birthday.

    Happy birthday, Husband!

  16. Linda

    That’s just beautiful. I hope your hubby has a wonderful day! Happy, happy birthday.

  17. This is so beautiful

    wishing your man, a very happy birthday and lots of fun, love and happiness to your lovely family.
    God bless!

  18. This is so sweet, so beautiful, and so full of love! You know I feel the same about my husband, so it warms my heart to see the outpouring of love for your husband and family. Happy birthday to your hubby! 🙂

  19. Sarah Klint

    This was really sweet! Happy Birthday B!

  20. I love this! You have given me an idea for how to wish my own dear husband a happy birthday!

  21. Husbands rock!
    Happy birthday to yours.

  22. That was just heartbreakingly beautiful. I am so glad you and your husband have this kind of love. Can’t wait to dig into the rest of you blog.

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  24. Bulgarian

    My favorite post from Aidan,The Incurable Romantic.

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