At the rehearsal dinner before our wedding, there were speeches. Wonderful, thoughtful, booze-fueled, speeches. And there was a theme, a word rather, that carried through said speeches: hot.
Yes, Husband is hot. I’m not going to lie and tell you that this fact did not play a critical role in our late-night bar encounter ten years ago. He was hot then. He is hot now. He is even hotter now. Why? Because he is a dad. A dad to my girls.
There is nothing more sexy than seeing my man with my girls. I can’t describe it, but it’s true. Witness Evidence A above. In this shot, Husband is kayaking with my littlest creature in the waters off Cape Cod. Sure, his muscles are swoon-worthy (sorry, Babe, ’tis true), but it’s really the fact that he is with her, my girl, our girl, that gets me most.
What is hot to you these days? Is your definition of hotness (a word?) different than it used to be? If so, how? Do you find your partner to be hot? How important is mutual finding of hotness (heat?) to a marriage?
I find it completely ironic that you did THIS post today! I came here yesterday to get your email address because I was going to email you a funny story (at least I found humor in it) but now that the platform is there, I will tell it here!
A couple of days ago I was telling DW about your blog, book, and the “year without wine” experiment, she is a substance abuse and addictions therapist, and it all piqued her interest and so we pulled out her laptop and she was going to find your blog to read and I started rattling off your name so she could goo.gle it and the very first “suggestion” that goo.gle search bar made (as in what most people search for) came up as Aidan Donnelley Rowley HUSBAND! The following conversation took place-
DW: “Why would people be looking for her husband?”
Me: “Not real sure…she only refers to him as HUSBAND in the blog so maybe they want to see the real guy she writes about.”
DW: Is he hot?” (Yes, she asked that, I kid not!)
Me: “I have never seen his face, but yes, from the way Aidan writes about him and the ‘distorted’ images I have seen, I do think he is hot. He seems to be smart and kind and a wonderful father, husband, and maybe I am reading too much into her words but he comes off like fun loving but….a gentleman, yes that is the word I am looking for, he is a gentleman.”
DW: “To live with 4 women he would have to be…”
Me: “Oh and did I mention he has a really nice backside?”
Perhaps this is more humorous to us because it was two lesbians discussing the hotness level of a man we have never met, or seen. But, it should be an indicator to everyone that the “hot factor” is very prevalent in our culture. Maybe it is because I use pseudonyms on my blog to protect, shield (not sure of the right wording here) our son’s privacy but I never had a desire to seek out more information than what you provide in your blog. To me he is HUSBAND, father to your GIRLS…he just happens to be HOT
Oh how I love this comment
A thoughtful reader emailed this morning expressing concerns that our little girl was not wearing a life jacket. Just wanted to clarify that Husband was in shallow water and practically on shore. We would never do anything to put our creatures in jeopardy!
I love this picture! As someone who is on the water a lot with my family, those times are very precious to me and this picture really captures it.
Your husband is hot (says the friend who drunkenly helped you stumble upon true love that fateful night
) and so is mine. I believe it is very important that we are attracted to our mates. For me, and you too, that translates in part to being superficially hot – yummy muscles, chiseled face, etc. Of course, that alone would be boring and irrelevant after 5 minutes. The reason our respective hubbies are so hot is because they have this outside layer and yet they are also sweet, thoughtful, intelligent, etc. (is that arrogant? oh well!)
I agree with you, seeing my man in daddy mode makes him all the hotter. It is just so tender and rewarding to see the people you love the most caring so much for each other. I really think its the hunter-gatherer thing – it’s in our DNA to find that hot!
For the millionth time, thank you for your drunken hubris that night in the bar. Without you, who knows, right? I agree with all that you say here – the true importance of physical attraction, the true importance of intellectual attraction. And I am so glad that you are with me that there is maybe nothing hotter than seeing the guys we love loving the little creatures in our lives! Miss you! xox
Agreed. Nothing hotter than watching hubby care for, play with, snuggle, kiss and hug my little girl. Take that, Christian Grey.
Yes! Such a funny aside, but they did a composite image of Christian Grey based on the descriptions in the book and apparently it was circulated around Husband’s office next to a picture of Husband. Apparently, people thought there was a keen resemblance
Too funny. Just curious – did you read these books? I haven’t but am a tinge curious!
Have not read, but have to for work. I hear they are poorly written but titillating. I’m curious.
Sweet and true there is nothing sexier than a man that’s a great dad.
Thanks, Ayala!
To me the weather is hot these days. Hotness is not a word, I prefer handsome. Handsome to me is someone who is Godfearing, bottom line. I believe when that when two souls meet, it’s beyond appearances. There’s something about a man who prays devotedly that is a huge blessing.
Thanks for your perspective, Monica!