I had a hard time falling asleep last night. Which was odd because I’ve been sleeping really well lately and because I was so tired. I was so wiped I nearly nodded off on the couch earlier in the evening during Mad Men. Anyway, it wasn’t fun. I just lay there, awake, thinking of all the things I need to do, and should do, thinking about my kids and my book and life, and watching it get later and later. I had planned to get up early this morning to write, but ultimately just turned my alarm off because it was getting too late.
I woke up this morning and had my coffee and dipped into a typical Monday morning, but I still felt a bit off. I took the girls to school. I settled in at a Starbucks near Preschool to write. And I got some really good work done. When it was time, I unplugged, went back out into the day, felt a bit better, but still not fabulous. I picked up my girl and we went for a little ice cream and read my girl’s library book while we ate it and then took the bus home. I did a few things and then worked out and, as always, this helped boost ye old mood. But not entirely.
I just met Sister C for a late salad lunch. She’s in town for a few days and we caught up and laughed. Again, this helped. And now I am home, sneaking in a bit more work in before heading out for a fun charity event. I know it will be a nice night and I’m looking forward to it, but I’m still dragging a bit and I can’t pinpoint why. I think everything in Boston affected me last week even more than I realized at the time. I think it’s hard to know how to process these things and move past them.
Also? I think These Days just exist, these less than rainbow days. I think that’s life. I think I’ve had so many really sparkly days recently that I kind of forgot about nights like last night and days like today. I decided not to post this morning because I just wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t want to write something bleh. But here I am kind of doing just that but I actually feel good about doing it because, hey, I don’t think I’m alone here. I think we all have These Days. Am I right?
I know I am right. We all have Those Days.
I’ll tell you something: The picture above makes me so happy. I took it yesterday morning at the Bronx Zoo. We got there super early and were among the first to arrive and the girls were elated and literally skipped everywhere. It was a beautiful morning. A morning of life and love and lots and lots of amazing animals. Talk about happiness.
But here’s the thing with happiness. It’s not a constant, linear thing. It has its blips, its pauses, its days. And that’s okay. That’s life, right?
(It is. I promise.)
Do you ever have One of Those Days? Were you affected by the unfolding events in Boston last week? Do you agree that happiness has its fits and starts, its bursts and blips? Do you ever have trouble sleeping even when uber-tired?